Here we go: So I was living in the Spanish House. I only lived there one semester: winter 2000 because I got in on like a random chance. It was a good thing for me to move because it was my one year anniversary of a sad event and I needed to get out and forget about it. So Spanish House. Lots of fun, but kinda strange at times. People who learn more than four languages within a four year time period have something twiqued in their brain I swear.

Anyway, so my apt starts hanging out with one of the boys Russian houses. They are in our FHE group and they are cool and we all get along. So Popi (Andrew) asks me out pretty soon and we go out, we have a good time, but nothing serious. He's cool but reminds me more of a little brother. Anyway, continue hanging out and Jesse and I start to kinda hit it off, we go for walks once in awhile and talk and he's cool. So this goes on for about a week and then I get a call on my cell one morning from Scott, Popi and Jesse's roommate. He asks me if I would be able to meet him for lunch that day? I said sure, no worries, I get off work at 12 and I don't have class until 2 or something so that sounds great. I worry about it the whole day because I'm expecting to get the "don't be messing with my roommates' hearts" speech. Technically I was "going on dates" with both of them, neither seriously, but Scott seemed like the traditional structured type who might be prone to right wrongs as he saw them.

So I meet Scott and we get some drinks or something and I was like, so what's up scott? He seemed REALLY nervous, which really threw me off. I couldn't guess what he was up to. So he tells me, "now usually, if I see my roommate going to for a girl, I back off, but not this time.(at which point he gets a little more agitated) I was actually the one who saw you first anyway and I'm not going to back off. So I just wanted to talk to you and tell you, well, that I like you too and well, I'd like a shot too." LOL... what do you say to that?!? haha... I really don't remember much of the rest of that encounter other than I said, okay,... well..., uh..., whatever... that sounds good I guess... and I left.

This happened like on a Tuesday or something and so Scott and I hung out the rest of the week on and off whenever Jesse wasn't around. I felt like we were having an affair. I wasn't too happy about the situation and so told Scott that he and Jesse needed to talk and do something because I didn't like this feeling of sneaking around.

So I think ... Thursday night, Jesse and Scott go for a "walk." Scott tells him about talking to me and they discuss it and come back and report to me that they have come to an agreement. They will both date me and let me decide who I like better. They even set rules that there would be no underhanded stuff and they would both give each other equal time and opportunity. I'm still not sure what to think about this but whatever, frankly I didn't think (intuition said at least) that things wouldn't work out with either one and well, I also liked this Other guy from my Spanish class named Winston, who I was also going out with. (LOL).

So, that weekend:
DATE #1 is with Scott. Friday night. I worked and went to class all day and then rushed home to go on this date with him at 5pm. By the time I get there, I'm exhausted and starving. Now one thing you need to know about me is I really don't like huge group functions. I mean I'm not opposed, but when I'm tired, it's just too much and I would much rather just have a quiet evening one on one. So this date with Scott is with about 20 other people and so I'm already talking to myself in my head going, "it's okay Lisa, you can do this, just be patient." but really I'm feeling distressed but I smile anyway. So first we go to his friend's house who happens to live at Cinnamon Tree Apts (where I lived for 2 years and had my whole engagement drama) so right off, I'm feeling distressed just being at this location again, but again, whatever, breathe, it's fine. So we go in and have dinner with these 20 other people. Another note here: I am NOT a picky eater at all. I come from a big family and I'll eat anything... usually... We are having baked chicken, (which is barely cooked, smells and promptly makes me very sick--can we say food poisoning???), rice (which is gummy and sticky and in mass clumps that seem impossible to eat). So finally, we have choked down dinner and this, compounded with the fact that I hadn't really eaten that much that day, I feel like I might throw up right there.

So we go from there to Extreme Sports where you play with these big toys and things. Scott and everyone runs around and I jump on this one thing and hit my heel really hard and can barely walk so I'm walking around trying not to throw up while my foot is throbbing...

So THEN, we finish there and they go, okay, NOW we are going to go play Laser Tag! Okay, another note here, I don't like Laser Tag. I mean I'm sure it would be fun with the right people but the only place you can really go in Provo is this one place. You only get to play for about 15 minutes, it's all black with these psycho graffiti messages all over the walls and hard rock music blaring the whole time. Frankly, that place scared me and I didn't like even being there much less running around in it pretending to kill people like we were at war! So I sigh, and again, here we go. We go to play Laser Tag and turns out two of my students from Farrer are there and so mostly I play around with them and actually managed to have a good time. Scott can't even figure out how to work his gun for most of the time and I'm kinda embarrassed for him.

Anyway, towards the end of this lovely time period, I come running around a corner in this maze and slam right into this girl and am thrown back against one of the walls. The girl feels bad and tries to help me up but I just run away. I have to go find a corner and make myself calm down because I feel myself shaking all over and kinda freaking out over it. Anyway, this makes this girl very mad and when the game finally ends and we are waiting for our "results," she is talking to her friends across the room about how rude I am and how she wants to beat me up. I'm standing next to Scott feeling nervous as I watch this group get more and more worked up and thinking, oh gosh, if that girl comes over here, I don't know what I'll do. Scott is oblivious to all of this of course and finally we leave before anything serious happens. We get outside, and by this time it's about 1 AM. The group is like, okay NOW we are going to go watch a movie!!! :) and Lisa went, hell no... I told Scott I wanted to go home. He was very mad and basically took it to mean I didn't like him and drove me home, fuming. I told him it wasn't that, but that I really didn't feel good and heavens, it was 1 AM! and so he took me home, and seemed very mad at me. *sigh*

DATE #2: The next day, Jesse and I go out. It's very simple, just me and him. We go to dinner, then go for a walk around the temple and talk. It's great. Quite the contrast to my horrible night previously.

CONCLUSION: ya, you guessed it. Sunday I talked to Scott and was like, ya know, I don't think so... then I talk to Jesse and said, ya know, here's the deal. Of the two (or three) of you, I like you the best, but please understand, this doesn't mean I am totally into you necessarily, it just means I'm saying I am not interested in them. I am still dating this other guy from my class as well and I'm not interested in being that serious. He is like, cool, that's fine.

TWO WEEKS PASS: and Jesse and I have hung out almost every day and held hands and kissed. Come to find out, I am the first girl he has EVER kissed (big red flashing lights right there). So finally, that Sunday afternoon, I'm feeling kinda depressed because that was The one year anniversary of breaking off my engagement so I take off and go walk around the temple (which is just right there). I don't think anyone sees me leave, but as I turn the corner of one side of the fence, there is Jesse waiting for me and asks me what's wrong and talks to me. I tell him my whole stupid drama story and cry. Okay, another note here: that morning we had gone to Stake Conference and he was VERY disturbed that I knew so many people. Our Stake included one of my old wards, including a hot EX of mine who loved embarrassing me in front of new men :) by hugging me all possessively and whispering into my ear. He was hysterical. Anyway, so Jesse and I had basically gotten into a discussion/fight at the conclusion of which I had basically decided that I really didn't like him that much. So this was sweet but my interest was definitely waning... So we walk around the bottom corner of the fence, and he stops me and he goes, "well Lisa, I was going to wait until I had a ring but this seems like a good time. Will you marry me? ....lol.... it takes me a minute to form any kind of words and finally I tell him: "I can't." "Okay," he says, "can I ask why?" "Well," I say, at the very least, because it isn't right. We aren't supposed to get married. It's that simple." (and after I just told you the whole engagement story five minutes ago, that should make a whole lot of sense!)

So we start walking back and he tells me casually, "You know, that's okay, I know you're just confused right now so I'll just let you think about it for awhile and I'm sure you'll change your mind." I turned and stepped in front of him then and said very pointedly: "Look, no means no. I am not confused. I will not marry you." He looks shocked and asked him, "Have you even prayed about this? I mean why do you want to marry me anyway?" "Well," he says, "You seem cool." (DON'T EVER SAY THIS TO A GIRL!!!). Why not???" I am still speechless as he explains: "The Lord would never tell me to marry anyone anyway. That would just be wrong." I really don't remember what I said after this, mostly I was just speechless.

The rest of the semester: He would randomly appear in places. He knew where all my classes were and he would appear at the door as I came out and "walk me" to my next class as I tried to ignore him, or lose him in the crowd of the JKHB. He spread rumors about me around the complex about how I had dumped him for some stupid reason and that I was comletely unreasonable and shallow. I VTed this girl who tells me all this at the end of the semester and comments, "ya I heard him saying that and I didn't think that sounded like you..." No kidding... Finally, the day of my final exam, I come out of one class with my two friends who I shared both classes with and I sit down the hall with them to study for our NEXT Final. Jesse comes over and sits RIGHT NEXT to me, and both my friends are like, "what the... who is this guy?" I scoot over and said to him: "Yes? What do you want?" "Just wondering how I could back in your life, that's all." he says to me. I feel naesuous. I think I just told him, "you can't" and tried to get up to leave but he wouldn't let me. My friends go into class as do the rest of the population, leaving Jesse and I in the empty hall with my classroom door open (with my whole class listening intently) :) He is like pleading with me to forgive him, that what he did wasn't that big a deal and why can't I just see that? I was like, "right, you PROPOSED to me on the anniversary of my engagement disaster and then have harrassed me all semester! How is that not a big deal?!?" I am getting some serious "backed into a corner" issues going here as he is still blocking my way to class and finally I just shove him aside and go to class. My whole class is just rolling and find it all highly entertaining but I am shaking I am so furious.