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27 aprile how you treat themStarting Wed night I had this huge allergy attack and so I stayed home from school and slept ALL DAY. HM did not get home until about 8pm and I was asleep that whole time. I'd wake up for a few minutes, eat a cinnamon roll and get a drink, watch a movie for about another 10 minutes and then fall back asleep. By the end of the day, the whole pan of cinnamon rolls was gone. I told this to HM and he laughed and gave me a big hug--"You feel better now? he asked, Now that you've confessed? This is confession Thursday, it's okay."
Anyway, the result of all this sleeping was that I was wide awake and so HM stayed late and we talked for a long time. One of the things we talked about was of course CR and L and Tigger and that ongoing problem. CR and L aren't even communicating at all and last week I told him, I remember coming over and the whole family was in the front room playing ping pong and chatting EXCEPT for HM's dad and L. HM's dad was watching the basketball game in the other room, and L was with him, text messaging. These days that is all I see her do when she is over there. I don't know who she is talking to but it seems to consume her. The other day HM and I got to his house and went up to his room to read and turn on the light and there she is, sitting in his room, in the dark, text messaging someone. As we came in, she stormed out and said about whatever was going on: "Everything is all [screwed] up. I just can't take it anymore!" (edited for content). Honestly, HM and I just stood there in shock, not sure what to do. CR was downstairs asleepand seemingly obvlious to his wife's current dilemma, or maybe just ignoring it, who knows. HM told me a few days later that she had told him to tell me she was sorry about what happened. But HM noted, not for using bad language in front of you. :) (how cute) Once she left, HM tells me: "I'm glad you're not like that." "Like what?" I asked (amused smile). "High maintenance and dramatic and unstable!" he said. "and that is one of the main reasons you are still around!" "I'm unstable sometimes" I told him. "Not like that though, he said, "you may have your moments but you are stable. Believe me I've had my share of girls like that I can't do that anymore: it's always about them, they always have some huge problem you have to solve for them and the whole world revolves around them." "Well, I told him, it all makes me ever more grateful for you and what we have. I'm glad you don't get mad at me, or be mean to me." His response was a good one I thought: "Why wouldn't I be? he asked. If you are the so special to me, why would I not treat you good? be nice to you? I mean doesn't it make sense that you treat the people you love the most, the best?" Good point. That SHOULD be how it is when you think about it, but often it doesn't happen that way.
Anyway, things are winding down here. I am planning my last month of school, doing all my copies and getting everything ready to go. FHS poses a problem because they don't have a very big computer lab. so trying to get my kids in a lab is difficult and so I'm trying to plan ahead. Strange though that this year is almost over and I'll have almost three months of NO work at all. The glories of being a teacher I guess, right? I am ready to be done frankly. Waking up at 5am is getting old and I'm ready to just be able to do my thing: paint, write and run and go to the beach :) 24 aprile ThoughtsMan, i'm sitting here, really feeling like just writing, but knowing that I really need to get some work done. So I'll try to write fast and then work too! :) HM and I have been up late for whatever reason the last two or three days, talking and being with family, so I'm running on low sleep here and that always makes me feel more pensive.
First thought: Yesterday I did actually take a nap but in the process I also watched a part of "Stranger Than Fiction" It's freaking hysterical! I wish I was good with names, but the Author is just a hoot. Sometimes I wish I was British so I could talk like that: "I don't need a secratry" she says. The way they same some words is just wonderful. Makes me want to just adopt random pronunciations of words. I'll start saying "secratry" instead of "secratary" and things like that. Course people would look at me strangely but hey... That movie makes me want to write a book and in my head I start narrating my life and what I would say if I was telling my own story... luckily it wears off after awhile....:)
Second thought: HM and the family meeting are coming up in about... 3 weeks I think. The family has finally made the arrangements they need and are officially coming. I think they will like him, I really do. I know HM is a bit nervous because this is much like a job interview for him and he's very conscious of all the physical faults that indicate he might be a bad person--for example his girlfriend's initials tatooed on his wrist that he had done for her since she liked that kind of thing. Things like that he gets very self-conscious about because while he was that way once, he is not any longer, but it still arouses suspicion I think and so he gets nervous he is giving the wrong impression. I think he will feel a bit better at least after we meet the family and all that. I try to tell him that my family is more concerned with how he treats me than who he used to be but I think he's still worried.
Third thought: I talked to my dad last night and actually had a good conversation. He told me that recently they were talking to his couple from their ward and mentioned to them that I was getting married. They asked what temple I would be getting married in and my parents said, well, it's probably not going to be a temple marriage right away. The woman gasped. "Aren't you so upset over that???" she demanded. My dad, in his very dry, but sarcastic way, said very simply: No. "why not???" the woman asked. "Well," my dad said. "We see temple marriages failing right and left just like any other marriage, she can get married in the temple any time, we are more concerned that they have a good relationship and if they do then things will work out for them." "Oh," the lady said. "I think you're right about that." lol... I can just see my dad's face: Well of course I am! :) haha...
Fourth thought: My dad also said that he was excited to meet HM because he was happy that I was marrying someone for the right reasons. My two brothers younger than me both married the 2nd girl they ever dated, ever. That can work and I'm not saying that's necessarily bad but I think that my parents worry about my brothers and how prepared they are to deal with the life conflicts when they know so little about women and relationships. I mean when the first hysterical sobbing irrational girl you ever have to try and deal with and comfort is your WIFE, I think that's kinda an interesting thing. My brother J just had a baby about a week(?) ago and since then my dad said they have gotten phone call after phone call from them asking "what do we do???!!!" over the screaming baby in the background. :) I think that's rather comical really. :) That's terrible but my brother can be such a "know it all" sometimes about things that it's funny to picture him in a situation where he doesn't know it all. How terrible of me...
I wonder too sometimes where the rest of my family was when my brothers were little. I was very involved in taking care of my last three--and really four--siblings from the time they were newborns and so not that I will know everything but I think I'll have a pretty good grasp on how to do things more or less. Sometimes it's weird to hear what your other siblings have learned or gotten from the same parents and the same household and think: man, what family were YOU in???
Fifth thought: and then I really have to go! I love HM and the wonderful person he is and how far he has come from what he used to be. Last night he went to this meeting and met a guy who he used to hang out with all the time. In fact this guy used to hang out all day with him, in his garage and he was one of his "soldiers" he says. Anyway, he sees this guy and instantly this guy starts telling him all about all these little scams they got going and this and that and HM said he let him talk and then later he told him, in the meeting in front of everyone: look, I don't do that stuff anymore and there is a better life out there. Things are really good for me now and I am actually happy. I know HM is very different now and I know that people who know him realize that even more. Hopefully this kid does good with HM as his example.
23 aprile FEARI feel stressed lately about the future. Many of my fears are typical I think of someone who has been independant for so long and is now getting married and throwing it all in with someone. There's the endless questions in my head, and in his of course, of how things are going to work out.
WHAT WE WOULD LIKE TO HAPPEN: We would like to buy a house here, live here for three years while D finishes high school, then sell the house--which would hopefully increase in value in that time--and move someone where houses are cheaper and buy a really cool house somewhere out of Btown--maybe Texas where he grew up.
THE PROBLEMS WITH THE PLAN: Houses here in Btown are VERY expensive. A decent house is over $250,000 and cool one is usually more like $300,000. He has horrible credit and mine is just okay so we--or rather I--am unsure that we will be able to get a decent loan for a house that expensive. More likely we will have to just rent someplace, save and try to find a good place. Which would mean we wouldn't have the equity of paying on a house during those three years.
ANOTHER COMPLICATION: We want to start having kids but if we have a house, or even if not, how do we survive on one income? HM's business is not big enough or constant enough to support us just on its own, which would mean I would continue teaching. How do you teach with a newborn? I know its done but what exactly do you do with a 2 month old baby when both parents are working? I am opposed to daycare personally and I would rather just not work when our kids are babies, but how is that possible?
A POSSIBLE SOLUTION: so maybe I could still work but do something that lets me be at home more... like write/illustrate books, run a daycare, or teach community or college classes where I would only be gone at various times instead of ALL DAY like public school. But how do I become a college professor? The local college that would be the most likely is having a little drama right now: all their teachers are going on strike... not exactly a prime time.... and books: well you know how hard that can be and it isn't any guarenteed income. Day care? Always wanted to do that, but even that takes money, and resources and frankly, I have no professional experience--all my experience is with older kids, not babies or toddlers. I am the 2nd of 9 so it's not like I have no experience, BUT that doesn't look that comforting really. But maybe it won't matter? But where would I have it? we don't even have a house! oh brother...
There are just so many things to figure out and so many things that are "ifs" that sometimes it gets overwhelming and frustrating. I'm sure that someday things will work out but in the meantime I guess I just need to be patient and not worry about it. I'm sure there are things already in the works...
Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out.
--James B. Conant 20 aprile The Big AnswersAs I was listening to the radio this morning, I wanted to call in and give my opinion, but I didn't. They were talking about the Virginia Massacre--funny how Official Names suddenly spring off and roll off the tongue so easily huh?--and they were discussing what "should have been done" to prevent it and talking about different "warning signs" that this guy had and the people who had contact with him and what they said about him.
Throughout the whole discussion, my answer to the "what could have been done" question was this: NOTHING. At least, NOTHING MORE than what was done. It just seems like when these things happen, people look at teachers and parents and friends and say: You should have known! Well, here's the truth: They DID know. They tried to help the kid. Services were there. People recognized that something was wrong. Maybe people did make fun of them, but who didn't get made fun of as a child? Honestly?! I am 100% sure that people DID try to make friends with them, they did try to bring them out, they did speak to them and make an attempt at relating. But my theory is, none of that worked. I have seen it happen over and over!
Picture a girl: she's quiet and just sits there looking pissed off, staring off into space. You are assigned to sit next to her. She NEVER says anything to you or even looks at you ONCE. You say hi, she doesn't reply. The teacher says to work with her, you lean over to her, she ignores you. You ask her questions. She ignores you. She won't even look at you or the paper. Finally you do the project on your own. What else do you expect them to do? VT kids say that Cho was "cripplingly shy" and writing was really the only avenue he had and his writing scared people...
I have a girl like this. After the whole year of greeting her at the door by name, she will almost smile but that's it. I saw her once talking to a friend on campus and saw her laugh and I almost choked. Once in awhile, if things are very quiet, I will hear her say "hi" very quietly back. That is the only thing I have EVER heard her say... to ANYONE. She wears the same black sweatshirt and jeans every day, hood up, long sleeves. I always wonder if maybe she is being abused but I have nothing to back up my claim other than a suspicion.
This girl is mostly just troubled, maybe just shy, but I have 3-4 boys who I think would be capable of a Columbine type escapade. One writes dark poetry, wears long jackets, always looks FURIOUS, and gets VERY upset if I correct him in any way at all. If I ever say anything to him about something, even just suggestions, he will stop working at all, put his head down and refuse to do anything, or he will give me death stares and act so wound up that it seems he will explode at any minute. Honestly, he scares me.
Another kid, had an episode today actually. I rarely see this kid--maybe once every two weeks does he come to class at all, so in a way that's good. Anyway, we were in the computer lab today and all of a sudden I hear this loud yelling and look over and this kid has stood up and is cussing and yelling as he's heading for the door. With a final slew of profanity, he banged out the door. Honestly the whole class just sat there stunned. What happened??? I asked the three guys sitting there. They all laughed. Anyway, after a stern talking to w/the responsible kid, turns out the one kid was teasing him about "being homosexual" and the kid just snapped. The kid who was making fun of him was also sent to the Dean and all that, but while I was doing the appropriate actions as a teacher, i was thinking to myself: I know this kid wasn't meaning to be mean or vindictive! Everyone else in class is victim to some banter once in awhile for whatever reason, and it doesn't mean they should storm out or even get upset. That was what most of them were saying, and my argument was that i didn't matter what you said, bad or good, if you hurt someone's feelings you should be aware of that and make the appropriate restitution, even if your intentions were pure.
This kid is someone who would bring a gun to school and plow down the whole studentbody and never had a second thought or an inkling of remorse. But what else should we do? He's in SpEd, he's in counseling, he takes anger managment, he's on medication. What else is there to do? He bonds with very few people and others...as you can see... not so well, and when he comes to class, he does nothing, seems almost completely unaware of anything going on around him. He's angry, violent and unpredictable. Honestly, he'll end up either in a home, or in prison, for probably most of his life. At least I hope. I just don't know how he would ever be able to handle himself in society any other way. Isn't that sad? But it's TRUE! This kid does not belong in normal society and he's barely making it in school, if at all.
Did they know that Columbine would happen? No, they didn't. But they suspected they were capable of it and they hoped and prayed it would never happen, but it still did, despite everyone's best efforts to prevent it. We live in a society that believes in equality and fair opportunity and I wouldn't change that. But our society is disinagrating and as a consequence, there are more problems and at some point, society rips at the seams. You produce kids who can't deal with their own problems, can't relate, can't even handle themselves or their emotions. That's the consequence of our society. I wish I could say there was a solution but really, there isn't. We do all we can. We try and try and try but if the kid REFUSES help,, REFUSES to listen, REFUSES contact and REFUSES reason, what more can society really do but install preventative measures? 17 aprile whew...So today we had TESTING... the ugly dirty word in education, right?
So I am thinking: man three hours! are they crazy??? That's WAY too much time!!!
But much to my surprise, today, after 2 hours, my kids had barely done Part 1--3 columns. They all managed to finish the remaining 3 columns and the 15 additional EAP questions in an hour and 15 minutes, but hey, nothing like lunch to motivate you right?
And even more surprising was that they were actually GOOD. I was shocked. I had one girl be kind of a problem but whatever, it was okay. I circulated around and passed out Starbursts and picked up wrappers. I just refilled their little pile every time I saw they were out and man, I think everyone was sick of candy by the end. It really did seem to help though and some kids started out acting kinda sleepy and after the first hour of candy, they sat up and took their test! :) LOL... Nothing like a little sugar to con them into working.. or at least to give them the energy to!
I knew this lady back at BHS who told me once that she didn't understand electronic equipment at all. So if she had to show a movie or something for her class, and something wasn't working, she would just indiscriminately start pulling out different wires, pushing buttons and all that. When the repair man inevitably came to fix the mess, he would exclaim about the mess her equipment and her response was always: Those dang kids! :) And she was such a sweet little old lady that everyone believed her! That always made me laugh. So my AC wasn't working today AT ALL. The kids were trying to test and the AC was just not even on. So I went over and tried to get it to turn down a little. Well, it wouldn't even turn to the AC, it was still on the heater. So I look and find the button that says: "AC, Heater, Off" and push it thinking it will switch it over... well... it didn't and instead, turned the whole thing off and no matter what, it wouldn't turn back on. So the temp climbed and climbed until I called the AC guy and he came over and fixed it. Wow, he tells me, this is LOCKED off! Man, someone around here must know how to mess with these things I swear, how could that have happend??? Hmmm... I thought to myself... I wonder how that happened... :D Those dang kids.... 16 aprile Tables, GV and SteriodsHM's family went to Lake Tahoe this last weekend and were gone from Friday morning to late last night.
It was VERY QUIET all weekend but also kinda nice.
The thing that his parents will be surprised at though, is that they have a new "table" in their house. And it's sitting right in the middle of their front room. :) (for lack of a better place to put it!) HM called me Friday afternoon and said he was at Sports Authority with a friend and they had found this pool/ping pong table for 50% off it's normal $600 dollar price. HM LOVES ping-pong and D loves pool, and D's birthday is in about 2 weeks. So after much debating and discussion, HM decided to get it and say it was D's birthday present.
The discussion was mostly about the practicality of it all because very soon here, we will be moving to "our own place" where we HOPE there will room for it in our "game room" (again, which we HOPE we will have) but that is still, at least, a few months away, and in the meantime, where do you put a medium sized pool table? the only perk is that the other side of the ping-pong table is a finished surface that could pass as a normal table...so that's good. They have this one old table in the "dining room" that no one ever uses or eats on that we could move out and put the table there... but then what do we do with the table? Chuck it or give it away, I said, but come to find out, this table is the first piece of furniture his parents ever bought together and hence it has sentimental value.... even though it's broken and never used. But hey, sentimental value.
So right now the table is sitting in the middle of the room, taking up a lot of space, but hey, it's great :) We spent the whole weekend playing pool and pingpong and having some great "family time" as it were with HM, me and D. After HM bought it, the brought it back in my truck and put it together. D was told he had to go to his friend's for awhile so it would be a surprise and then we let him come back and see it and play with it. D and his friends hung out there at the house Friday night AND Saturday night, which is unheard of, so I know that made HM happy. I know he likes it when D and his friends are around.
Anyway, we were a bit nervous about how his parents would reacte to this large thing in their living room when they come from their weekend, but HM said they liked it and his mom even said she's been trying to get her husband to buy one for years and he never has so she's happy. *whew* :)
So anyway, it's back to school and work today and man, it seems like summer should be here already!!! I'm ready to be done! And well, honestly, I'm ready to be done with teaching. I'm very sick of it and I really want to do something different. I went to a workshop last Friday and talked to a lady there and some people at my table about how I could apply to teach college. I'll have my Masters in May, officially, and so maybe that's something I'll try. I like teaching, it's just I want something different, something challenging. I feel like I have conquered this venue as it were and I want to do something else now... unfortunately, most of what I want to do--like something in administration--will take a few years and I don't know how much more time I have until I start my family and I won't be able (or willing) to work full time in school like I am now... So maybe something that would have a different schedule perhaps than the strict 7-3 every day. I don't know. I would also like to start writing more and work on publishing more things and it would be nice to have a little time to research and write and have that be part of my job also. Anyway, it's an idea.
I have also kinda made another decision: I think I am going to transfer to Golden Valley. My friend Dave is the Department Head there and I think it'll be better. I got a lot of crap--or rather lamenting--from Mike and Bryce when I went to the workshop Friday because I didn't apply to Frontier. They were both upset that I didn't put in to go there and truth be told, I wasn't aware that I had to do it so soon. I thought I still had some time left to decide but I guess not. So oh well. A good point Mike made was this: he point at all the Foothill group that were also there and he asked: Do they appreciate you like we do??? Do they know what kind of amazing teacher you are??? "Well," I said, "they don't KNOW me mike!" And I know that would just take time, but I am out here in the portables and he's right, no one really knows what kind of teacher I am because I have kept a pretty low profile here this year. I want to be somewhere where I am recognized for what I can do and I think that at least if I go to GV that Dave--who I did like my ENTIRE masters degree with--will know me and recognize me for what I can do. At least there I will have more opportunities to branch into admin and if for no other reason, it's a whole heck of a lot closer than here!!! It's no more than 10 minutes from my house, where here is a good 20-25. Course who knows where we will be living in the Fall...probably on the other side of town so this won't even make a difference... but whatever, I guess it just comes down to this: where will I have the most opportunities and where will I be happiest? I think that is GV, I think? I like it here, I just don't LOVE it and I dont' really have anyone here who knows me that well and over there, there are a few people at least who do. I don't know honestly, I am doing this and seeing what happens because I've prayed about it and mostly I get the: "whatever you want to do, that's fine, it's doesn't matter" kinda answer. So whatever, I guess I'll just do this and see what happens.
Testing starts tomorrow: basically from tomorrow on, the rest of the week is going to be short classes. I have my 3rd period for a good THREE HOURS. ugh. That is my little gang-banger class and they are probably all gonna moslty fail their test anyway, so they won't be spending that much time working on it. Sad but true. So that means I'll have 25 bored kids looking for something to do for most of 2 hours of that 3 hours. What fun...
Funny story: Today 1st period, my student Frankie comes up to me and asks me if I want to hear a funny story? So then he tells me that over the weekend, he had to go to the ER because he had this bad asthma attack. So the doctor gives him these drugs that the doc tells Frankie, have Steriods in them to help stimulate his lung tissue and make it stronger and all that. But Frankie, doesn't really hear all that, all he hears is STEROIDS. So that night, he goes home and says he just feels like working out... so he starts doing all these exercises because he feels "stronger" and that they are making his muscles all bigger... :) "You understand there are different kinds of "steriods" right??? haha...cute kid.... 12 aprile The Joys of Frisbee GolfSo HM's sister ST is here and this creates some very interesting situations at times. She is a part of the family of course so she knows them all very well--more than I do. But at the same time, HM and I have been dating for almost a year and this is the first time I have even MET her at all--as opposed to SA who lives in Alaska but whom I have met twice. ST doesn't exactly spend a lot of time with the family--even for holidays.
But now she is "Back" and living at her parent's house at 25. Everyone thought she would move in with CH and his girlfriend since they have a spare bedroom but she didn't. CH and his girlfriend are... well... let's just say they are more like ST and so it would make more sense that ST live with them than live with her parents. But she hasn't, and so that's a different thing that I don't think anyone really expected.
Like I have mentioned earlier, HM has had a tremendous influence on his siblings--for good and for evil. ST still parties and does everything but seems to at least WANT to change since she has been here and around HM and I and also around DA who is her new boyfriend I guess. Both DA and HM work together and share common goals of being sober and good and all that. So having DA and ST hook up could be either good or bad depending on who has the most influence: DA has been sober and good and so that could rub off on ST and make her want to get off all her little addictions. Or it could influence DA to start up again... which we don't want... So we'll see what happens.
Anyway, the new "thrill" that ST introduced is Frisbee Golf. I guess she's gone to tournaments for it, has a bunch of special Frisbee Gold frisbees and it's all the rage. During Spring Break, I was at home, waiting and waiting for HM to call and say he was ready. He should have been home showering like he had said earlier he was going to do, but finally, at six o'clock--almost an hour late, I get a call from him. "Go to the park and play Frisbee Golf with ST" he tells me. (by myself???) "okay.... where are yoU?" "Oh I am already HERE he tells me, playing Frisbee Golf with her, and I thought you might like to join us. I didn't go home to change and shower, I just came straight here to play with her...." oh really....
So I go there, fuming as I went I must admit. He was playing Frisbee Golf in his workclothes??? He would NEVER do that for me... but then I've never asked... He is usually so insistent on changing and looking nice... especially when running around a public place.... and who says I WANT to play Frisbee Golf anyway?! I have played it before and it's stupid... combining two already stupid games together: Golf and Frisbee! It's not like either one is that exciting and then they combined them to make it worse!!! And to top it off, a good friend once told me if you ever see people playing Frisbee Golf, you can bet they are high or drunk. And if they tell you different, they are LYING. I mentioned that to ST and she was like, "well yup, actually that's true. I think this is the first time I have ever played sober!" So I get to go to the park and play the addict's favorite sport?? great... lucky me!
So I arrive at the park and HM and ST have already been practicing and she starts trying to "coach" me on what to do, and I am even more irritated at being bossed around and told how to do something so stupid like throwing a frisbee. As we go through the course, she keeps giving me "pointers" and I am getting really irritated. Finally HM hugs me and says in my ear: don't be mad gorgeous, we're together, that's all that matters, this is just what she wanted to do so i thought we'd come do it with her." Fine... I tried to have a good time but I was feeling very rebellious and irritated at everything. I honestly tried to be nice to ST but I think it was obvious I was hating it even though I was trying.
So I'm thinking, okay good, we got that over with. But no, before we go over the relatives house on Sunday, we stop for a round (and it was on Sunday which I also was irritated at) and then Tuesday, I don't see HM until almost 7 because (he tells me afterwards) he was at the park playing for a good three hours, after DA and him when and bought their OWN set of special Frisbee Golf discs and so didn't do the things he needed to do and had to run do his errands before we could hang out even though he had only worked until 11am that day. Then yesterday, I call HM when I get off work and he says, hey honey, if you WANT ;) (We did talk about how I was irritated that he had TOLD me to go play so that was a good approach at least) we are playing Frisbee Golf and we are about to start another game if you want to come play--ST, DA, my brother and my dad are all here! Since the first game, I had just walked around with them and not played and that was better. So I go over there and walked around with them until D came and then him and I played as a team.
When I played with D finally, I did have a good time, so maybe I'm just being grouchy, but it just bugs that this stupid game could take up so much time and frankly, I feel like it's cutting into MY time with HM which makes me even more cranky. BUT, it's not like I can hoard him away, family time if important so I should be patient, but STILL, Frisbee Golf is beginning to BUG.
Anyway, on a more positive note: I finally got to have a good conversation with my mom about the wedding and plans and all that. They will be here in May for my graduation and will meet HM for the first time. Yikes... I am pretty sure they will like him. I shouldn't be worried but I kinda am. My sisters have met him and they really like him and us together and all that, so that's a good sign.
09 aprile Happy Hispanic MondaySo it's the first Monday back from Spring Break and ya: NO ONE is here. Big surprise to anyone? Other high schools in the district had NO school today or late starts. Not my school though: they continue on like no one will notice that only half the student body showed up today.
Course if we had today off, no one would have showed up tomorrow either.
So really, maybe it's smarter this way because at least then you can have four good days when people actually come... so at least a late start would have been nice...
But this school I have found, doesn't really DO late starts. Apparently there is some thing with the busses and so even if we do a late start, the kids still come at the same time and hang around and cause problems. I mean it's not like these kids have their moms waiting for them at home who could just take them to school later and pat their little heads. If the busses can't pick them up, they aren't coming!
Such is life though... hey, if I could have thought of a good excuse to stay home today, I think I would've. Honestly. But I couldn't really think of any good reason to stay home another day because there would be no one there! I mean there is only so much time you can spend with your dog, hanging out at your apartment by yourself before you get sick of it! It was nice in a way to come back to school, but it's just the principle of it all... who ever wants to come back from a vacation? Eventually... but the idea is just not appealing.
Anyway, it's kinda weird to be back. I have a lot to do and the kids didn't seem to have done anything to catch up their grades at all. For the most part, I have just heard how they got drunk, high and dirty. *sigh* Midterm grades come out in a week and their grades are a disaster... 03 aprile Tread on MeI guess I should have expected something to happen. On days when the world seems to stand still and be quiet, it seems something crashes together somewhere. That's a rather depressing statement huh? It's not meant to be, actually, it's more funny considering what happened. It seems like whenever Andre and I go out on an "Adventure" something happens.
So yesterday Brooke and I went to the beach, it was kinda cold but we still ended up getting burnt pretty good. We got home about 7 and I went out to dinner with HM and ST. The next morning, I got up and did a few things and went to the store and then packed up and went fishing :) Now, let it be said here: I AM NOT A GOOD FISHERWOMAN. :) But I like it and it's relaxing so hey, why not. I went once as part of my "recovery" and then invited HM on a trek shortly afterwards and that was how we ended up "hooking up" as it were. I passed the steps where we first kissed today actually and the memory made me smile :) Who would have thought all this was possible from just that little night of running around not catching any fish? I guess we caught each other instead of the fish :) haha...
Anyway, so we walked all over, fished for awhile, didn't catch anything, had the traditional conversation with a random person about how the fishin' was today, and then we were walking along the bike path heading towards the car. There are two different parks along the bike path that we passed. At the end of the 2nd one, there is this washer thing like they usually have at the beach. There's a column with buttons and you press a button and it's gives you a shower. Don't know why it's there by the park and by the bike path, but whatever. Every time we passed it, (4 times) I would push the buttons and make Andre run through it--okay I pushed him through it--to cool him off. So we had just passed that and were continuing on, when I heard behind me:
"Mom, what is that?"
And I turn around to see a mom and her two kids on bikes coming towards me. The little boy had asked the question and was pointing to the shower thing but I guess the mom didn't hear him because she didn't answer him. As I was wondering if she was going to answer him,
CRASH
I feel something hit me
And it was the little boy! And his BIKE :)
I guess he hadn't been looking at all, since he was looking at the shower thing and while his mom and sister both went around me, and hey I was off to the side anyway, he was right on the very edge of the path and rammed right into me.
It scared the poor kid TO DEATH and he started to just cry as he got up.
It was one of those experiences where you are in it, but you go, did that just happen???
Anyway, I look down and the back of my leg where he hit me with his bike is bleeding and there is this big chunk out of it and the blood is already starting to run down my leg. He hit both my legs so the whole back of my legs was throbbing. The poor kid was crying and I was trying to soothe him and get Andre out of the way and try to keep from bleeding all over and finally the mom showed up.
She tried to soothe the kid too and asked me over and over if I was okay. I was still kinda reeling and the kid was crying and I was looking at my leg wondering if I would have to have stitches and it was just crazy. Finally though, I got myself together enough amid the "Are you okay? Are you okay?" and I gave the kid a hug, or at least tried to, and then I went over to a tree, tied up Andre, and dumped my backpack and walked to the shower thing. I washed off the cut and it wasn't that bad. The cold water numbed it pretty good and it actually felt better afterwards. The mom tried to get me to ride her bike to my car and she would take Andre but I insisted that I was fine, I had seen worse (and I have!). The little boy through all this finally did calm down and as I was collecting Andre and my stuff he came back and said "I am SO SORRY for what I did and I hope you're okay." I was impressed with the kid, really. Looked like his mom was teaching him good manners and that he was a smart kid.
We went home after that, enough excitement for us! And washed out the cut and really, it's not that bad. Funny thing though is that you can see the tread marks on my leg :) Kinda a cool little cut if you ask me :) Need FeedbackThe Strength of Numbers Once upon a time, there was a small flock of ducks that lived on a small pond in the forest. The water was fresh, the grass was clean, and the ducks got along and were happy. However, even though they had very little reason to leave, they couldn’t. Tall trees and thick bushes barred the pond from the outside world on all sides except on the southeast corner. In that corner lay The Box. The trees were thinner there but the exit was blocked by the box that was under the water and the whirlpool above it. Many ducks through the years had been caught in it. The whirlpool had a strong current and once you were sucked into the box, there was no escape. The walls were thick concrete and there was no way out of it. So whether by accident or on purpose, any attempt to conquer the box failed. One day, all this changed. For the first time, a new duck arrived in the flock. He had heard of their troubles and had come to free them, he said. “I have twice the strength of any duck!” he claimed “And the courage of ten!” “I will overcome where you have failed and finally you will know the joy of freedom!” The entire flock celebrated into the night and prepared eagerly for their freedom. As the morning broke, they gather on the beach and cheered as he started across the pond to the Box. Closer and closer he came until the wisps of the currents began to pull him in. He struggled… He fought… And the flock stared in awe as he fought the mighty water. It all ended quickly. One minute he was there, winning. And then with one loud slurping sound, he was gone. He hit the bottom of the box with a loud thud, just like every duck before him had done. Back on the beach, everyone was silent. They stared in shock at the swirling hole where their hero had just disappeared and no one moved for a long moment.
THE ENDING IS NOT FINISHED YET.... :) More to follow, what do you think so far? |
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